It's Really That Simple

Dear Reader, whoever you are:

       This morning was a whirlwind of activity. I got up early to go take my brother to school and pick up my car from the shop, then took my sister to swim practice. I accomplished more in three hours than I had all last week! haha. As we drove I listened to the radio and talked with my dad about all that was wrong with the world. Oh boy is there a lot. I mean it's so much that I was getting really discouraged. I got in my car after we picked it up and talked to God the whole way home about how really messed up things are. How could they ever be fixed?
       I know people who are really angry, all the time. They just can't seem to see the light, even when good things happen. It's easy to get that way today isn't it? Orlando, ISIS, economy, elections, even problems in your own home. How can anyone be happy, or anything be ok? How could anything be fixed? The people I know get fixated on the wrong. Fixated on how badly they've been hurt that they can't see any good. They want justice. They want revenge. They want everyone to be in the same depths as them, not necessarily out of spite, but because they think that they see reality and are doing others a favor. I was one of them for a while.

       Then God slapped me and said "Knock it off goofball. KISS - Keep It Simple, Stupid."

       Over the past few weeks I've been really thinking about this a lot, God's simplicity, and how He could possibly operate in all of this, and how it could be fixed. The more I do, the more I see the answer staring right in front of me:

       "Hello  World, Hope you're listening. Forgive me if I'm young for speaking out of turn...

I get lost in the beauty of everything I see, and the world ain't half as bad as they paint it to be.

If all the sons and all the daughters stop to take it in

the hopefully the hate subsides

and the love can begin."

- Come Home by One Repulic (selections, divisions added)

       Love. Love radically. That's it. That's all there is to it. Maybe you say I'm just young, naive, and unrealistic. Yeah, that's true. I am young and naive. I know I can't save the world. But one person loving radically can change all of that. One woman going into the slums brought hope to millions around the world. One man choosing to peacefully stand up for the Truth brought a revolution in how we treat others in America. How? They chose to love, and love radically. She just showed people that they were humans too, and deserved to be treated like it, no matter who they were. He didn't fight back, didn't yell or use foul language, didn't try to divide or polarize, but simply advocated for loving everyone as humans. That's it. And that's how we do it. Simply loving.

       I'm involved in a lot of ministry and often have people ask how to proceed, how do we change hearts, minds, make a difference? We don't. God does that. We are simply called to love. Gay or Straight, Black or White, Rich or Poor, Sick or Healthy, Religious or atheist, whatever other divisions don't matter. First and foremost they are human beings created in the image and likeness of God, and deserve to be treated as such. ** NOTE: I'm not at all saying that you change your beliefs. I'm VERY Catholic, and my friends know that. I don't budge on my church's teachings, and will defend them to the end. I'm simply saying that condemnation is not where we start,** We start by loving. 

       As I began writing this I found a story about a little girl who died recently, linked here. The little girl says "Love is a superpower. It makes bad people good." YOU GUYS! She was 5! WOW. When I read that I was speechless. Like this 5 year old girl had a better understanding of love than I do. Read Matthew 5:43-48. This is exactly what Jesus says to do,

       Imagine this world. Imagine a world where we entered into conversations with another human being as an image of the living God, and treated them like it. What could we learn about God from them? What a unique and beautiful gift is each and every individual. All of them. No matter how the same or how different. Imagine loving them because in spite of the bad you choose to focus on the fact that God thinks they are worthy of love. Image seeing the world with the eyes of God. Imagine how politics, wars, divisiveness and polarization of any kind would slowly disappear. Yes, they would always exist, but how we could start them shrinking today! I know in my life the times God has worked the greatest deeds through me were when I started with love. 

       I am naive and wide eyed enough to believe that I can change the world. I believe you can too. I believe God wants to, through all of us. What if we just started with love? It's really that simple! Simple doesn't mean easy, but it does mean beautiful.

Dear Reader, Whoever you are, believe me when I say that I love you. You are His, and you are incredible, and I value you. I challenge you reader, love others as well. Love wins. God wins.

Amen.

~ Wanted, Needed, Loved, His ~

Mary and Martha

Dear Readers,

I'm sorry I've been gone for so long. It's been over a year now. A lot has happened. I spent a year trying to do things my way, and God spent a year messing it up (in the best possible way, though it took some time and distance to see that). Over the past few weeks I've had ample time to think over the past year and just listen. I've spent a year being Martha, and it was finally time to be Mary. This is the story of me, Mary, and Martha. And so we go...

       After the last post I retreated deep within myself. God was there, pulling me out, and things went good for a time. Fall semester hit and I fell into a habit of studies, friends, work, and extracurriculars. I was doing lots of things FOR God, but not really listening much to what He had to say. And I was pouring way too much into friendships that I should have been bringing to Him. 

        Winter rolled by and He opened up some old wounds to try and bring us closer. It worked for a bit. I let down my walls. Released my death grip on my life and let Him work. ... And then life hit once again, and the walls came back up. I ran back to the friendships, the classes, the work. I found that the tighter I held, the more things came apart. I damaged friendships and relationships. I cared less about my classes. The things that I used to do for fun were now chores that had to be checked off. When people asked how I was doing I said "Fine." Granted my Grandmother passed away in there as well, but I didn't necessarily handle that the best. 

       Anyways by the end of the semester I was drained. I was battling angst against old wounds, broken friendships, misunderstandings with roommates, and so many other things I was ready to be done and go home. I talked to several friends about all of it, over and over again. But try as I might I couldn't turn to God. I had lost my heart and until I found it I couldn't bring myself to return.

       I was trying. I was trying so hard. I was fighting to do the right thing: in my struggles with sin; in my relationships, in friendships, with roommates, in school, etc. I was trying. I noticed that THAT was the phrase I told myself, friends, God, more than anything else. "I'm trying God. I'm trying," I would cry out at night. I've found that the phrase I tell myself most often tells me more about myself than I can see on the surface (more on that another time). But no matter how hard I tried, nothing changed. 

       So finally, when I got home from school, I gave up. Not in the "Screw God and them too" kind of way. I'd tried that before for a week or two and it just didn't work. More like total surrender. I was finally worn down enough to, without quite realizing it, let down my walls. "Here, take it," I seemed to say in my heart, not really knowing that's what I was doing. I started talking to Him again, not just listing problems but having conversations like we used to. And the more I let go of "trying", the more Me I felt. After a week retreat of sorts with some friends in the mountains of Arkansas, I realized I hadn't been trying for a while, and it felt so much better. 

       And that's when  I finally got it. I spent the past year trying. I was trying to be the perfect man. Trying to be the perfect student, perfect friend, perfect everything. But that's not what God was asking. I was trying to be what I THOUGHT God wanted me to be. I was trying so hard. And in all my trying my hands were closed. I was grasping at all I thought I needed to be, and left no room for God to be God. I didn't listen.

       God didn't want me to try. Not like that. He wanted me to listen. He wanted me to receive. A wise priest friend of mine once told me that we don't get to grasp at our identity. We become who we are meant to be when we are open enough to receive it from God. In all of my trying I had stopped listening. And once I listened I found peace.

       Dear Readers, I think far too often we are so focused on trying we miss the heart. I spent a year being Martha when He wanted me to be Mary. We take ourselves far too seriously. All of these worries, all of this bitterness, I let all of it cloud my heart and drag me down. That's not what He wanted. He wanted me to live simply in the joy of knowing Him. I missed out on so much because I couldn't let go of MY idea of who I was meant to be. I was trying. But I wasn't getting anywhere.

       “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:41-42

    I think we get so caught up in being Martha that we forget it was Mary that Jesus commended. Mary didn't DO anything. She sat and she received. Once I let go of my trying, I was open to being who I was always mean to be. Now when I find myself slipping up and saying "I'm trying" I stop myself. "Here I am Lord. I'm listening." 

       And you know what? In the silence I found Me again. Or rather He showed me who I always was. Stop trying to be who you think you need to be, and receive who you already are. Sit at His feet. He's waiting.

-------

I am so sorry I took a year off. It took me a while to learn the lessons God wanted me to learn. For better or worse, it's what happened. Now I'm ready to choose the better part. I might/will have to make that decision many more times in life, and that's ok. As long as I'm ready to listen.

I have a feeling this blog will look a little different from now on. And that's ok. I'll keep listening. I know who I am now. I am His. And so are you.

Love you all, and praying,

~Wanted, Needed, Loved, His~